An open letter to my pregnant best friend ❤

An open letter to my pregnant best friend.

Dearest T,
I can't believe we are down just 4 weeks to go. I don't think I will ever forget that phone call when you told me you were like 5 minutes pregnant... I choked on my coffee, it came out my nose as I cried big soppy happy tears. My happiness for you chokes me, I feel it in the deepest part of me, my heart could burst with love. I mean I could have slapped you silly at the time for telling me so early, who knew I could keep a secret so well... you obviously did. And I'm so glad you did... especially after the 12 week mark when I could boast about already knowing and about how good my secret keeping skills are!! Watching you glide through the journey that is pregnancy like you were born for it, you are already nailing motherhood, you've got the glow thing down 😍

Everything is about to change (for the better, obviously), these next four weeks are a bit like your last hurrah, soak up the sleep, soak up the bump kicks, soak up baby daddy G, those moments of just you and him are about to become too few and far between. He is about to go way down on your list of priorities, I say list because your brain is about to become mammified, be prepared for mental lists, be prepared for ticking those bastard boxes on the mental lists in your brain when you've got a window of about 30 mins to try catch up on sleep. Sleep... it's over rated... you need to really believe this to get through the next 2 years. Even if you have an angel baby (which every pregnant mammy believes they have) who sleeps all night I can almost guarantee you still won't, especially the first month, you'll be sat there staring at it, thinking about its amazingness, wondering how on earth one little person could possibly be this perfect, thinking surely he/she deserves some kind of acknowledgement or recognition from the president or something, like how on earth have they not realised the future king/queen of "everythang" has just been born. It's little hands, tiny little toes, the smell... oh the smell... even their shit is heavenly for the first few weeks... I've come to the conclusion this is a greatly disguised trick to help you adjust to the shit that's to come... the nice smell fades and your left with normal shit... but by then your so attached you couldn't possibly hand them back... even when they do the runny ones that resemble an absolute massacre wreaking havoc on the John Rocha vest and baby grow... another tip... stick with penny's hun 😘

Baby daddy G. You've sort of moulded into one, you've been together so long you've started to look like each other.. in a good way... you don't think you could love him anymore? You can, you will, that day when your lying on your back with your legs in the air squeezing out a little person the size of a generous bag of spuds... squeezing the life from his hands and throwing death threats at him... before you know it they'll put your little person in your arms and boom... your born. Mother T is born. Love will come gushing from every pore... your heart will all but explode and you'll look at him... he's not longer just Al he's now baby daddy G. A whole new love will evolve between you both that day. In his eyes you are now Queen fucking Latifa, he will be in awe of your every move. Use this to your advantage. Housework and cooking are about to become second nature to him... well they are if he wants to live. Your going to be far to busy, feeding and staring at baby G. And that's OK. Relax, enjoy it. Don't try to do everything, ly there, your bonding. It's an integral part of new mammyhood.

Of course with mammyhood comes the knowitallhood. For this I advise you develop a thick skin... smile and nod and when they're out of earshot phone me and we can have a good ol mammy bitch about them. They will have opinions on how you feed your child, dress your child, hold your child, you'll be holding it too much/not enough, they will tell you to put that baby down, stop spoiling that child - you'll be sorry... apparently. You won't. You won't be one bit sorry. Your the mammy. You know best. I promise you, you will always know. I really meant it when I said mother T was born. With motherhood you will develop an extra sense - mammy sense. This will see you through the next 18 years or so... along with coffee (I know you don't like coffee... but talk to me 6 months in) wine (again... talk to me 6 months in) and an abundance of secretly stashed chocolate. And I promise to be there, every step of the way.. just as you have been for me. No judgement, no knowitallhood, just me. Your friend. Your sister. Listening. Bringing coffee/wine/chocolate. Babysitting, so you and baby daddy G can still run the risk of baby G number 2 being a strong contender within the first year... 🙊💏💑👪❤(I mean to be fair I owe you that many babysitting hours I could probably just take the baby for the first year... you will finally understand my gratitude to you. Child 2 and child 3 probably wouldn't exist only for you.)

You are about to embark on the most amazing journey of your entire life. You will never experience highs like it, but know that there will also be lows (and that is so ok) days when your emotions and love for this little person will drown you... quite literally drown you. In tears. Happy tears. Sad tears. Tears of sheer exhaustion and frustration because baby daddy G will not hear that baby at night time after the first month. Every night. Snoring his little head off. While you sit up comforting baby G imagining putting a pillow over his head, sitting on said pillow and smothering him. 3 hours later you wake to find him cuddling baby and your crying again... this time because when you see them together, when you see him as baby daddy G your heart will literally swell like your feet did in the 9th month.

So maybe don't kill him... just ride it out... it'll pass, I promise you will love him again in about 5 minutes. Pick up the phone... rant to me... and before we hang up we'll be struggling to breath between the snorts and the laughs... so much is about to change but that never will. I will always be there. I have been where your about to go. I will pick you up and dust you off. I will take the baby. Love the baby. Just as you have done for mine. And together, we will be like the sisterhood of invincible mammys.

You've got this T.

I love you.



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